REAL CHARACTER BIOS

SECRET & TOP MEMBERSHIP EXCLUSIVE

SPOILER ALERT!

In alphabetical order, by last name.

Dr. Reuben Abrams – You really have to be some sort of a nut to run Club Hero’s Bio- and Cryo-Physicist lab. Lucky for our favorite Science Team, Reuby fits the bill. He’s got more quirks than a quark, can practically take flight in conversations, and does his best work in the company of utter chaos. Someone get this man a pickle.

Alice – Alice wins for having both the smallest and baddest little ass of all the Fur Balls. Sharp as a tack, our favorite grasshopper mouse literally eats scorpions for breakfast and sharpens all Dane’s pencils. And, if that isn’t enough, she’s got one hell of a roar!

Arnie (AKA The Hall Monitor) – A two-bit prankster and QUEST’s annoying neighbor, Arnie earned the nickname Hall Monitor, for being more punk than spunk. Fortunately, he’s easy to skunk.

Asshole – Grandma’s nasty neighbor, a bad cop with a gambling debt who banks on his badge to get him out of any jam. Past times include kicking pretty much everyone whether they’re up or down.

Ms. Edwina Banks (Eddy) – Camp Hero’s Team Linguist and Aaron’s right hand, Eddy is primarily in charge of ground security. With the charm of a cat and the strike of a viper, our fave femme fatal knows how to cut to the chase. This is one bank you don’t try to rob.

Dr. Walter Blank – A Quantum Physicist famous for living up to his surname. Our good doctor enjoys defacing walls, heated debates, and dissecting multi-functional tools.

Mr. Boyd – A representative of one of QUEST’s biggest suppliers. Also, an alcoholic moron who likes to hit on ladies, literally.

Mr. Brooks – Ivy-trash Chairman of the Board at QUEST with an unhealthy penchant for innuendo who thinks his shit don’t stink.

Bernie – The baby girl of the bunch, our favorite gibbon likes to hang out in Dane’s Hanger at the Zoo. She also likes to hold hands, pet your face, and do a number of other excruciatingly adorable things that will make you cry. Bernie’s a lover, not a fighter. Still, I wouldn’t box with her. She’s got a hell of a reach.

Cherie – Pronounced like sherry, not cherry, this southern belle still captured Webster’s heart. The cherry dumplings didn’t hurt, but she’s truly as sweet as they come.

Mz. Lindsey (Lin-Z) Draper – Pluck doesn’t begin to describe LinZ. This gal just doesn’t give up. Past times include gHost hunting, pretending to be a ghost, and looking like a ghost. Still, we wouldn’t say, “Boo”, if we were you.

DYNAMO – Our gHost in the machine, Dynamo run’s QUEST’s AI department. Past times include messing with super villains, “borrowing” global resources, and looking for someone to play Crystal Skullz with. Shattering the glass ceiling, Dynamo’s proven that chicks don’t need a great bod to dominate the world.

Dr. Stanley Eriksson (AKA Hatter) – A Camp Hero Computer Scientist with a thing for hats. Past times include hacking government agencies, developing unsolvable puzzles, and pretending to quit smoking. We’re just glad his hat’s white and he hasn’t gone too far down the rabbit hole … yet.

Mr. Trey Evers, MA – A skateboarding, ADHD pyro who comes from a family of mafia wannabees, Trey runs the laser end of QUEST R&D when he is not burning holes through shit. Or, was it ‘shrooms?  Anyway, don’t give him coffee, sugar, or any other stimulant unless you come armed with at least three fire extinguishers and are prepared to deal with the fire department.

Ginger – Ninety pounds of chocolate love, Ginger fits the bill as Ever’s emotional support lab. Who knew a dog’s ears could have hypnotic qualities? Not only can this gal smell the call of the wild. She’s got the scariest, sweetest smile you’ll ever meet. You’ll know, when she looks you in the eye.

Grandma – Cherie’s mom. Proud, stubborn, and streetwise, Grandma may mince pies, but she doesn’t mince words. During her lifetime in the Hub, she’s seen it all, and tells it like it is.

Dr. Amy Harmon – Pranksters and punks beware: this medicinal mycologist won’t be out-schooled. You know she’s a whip if she can handle Foster. And, she makes a mean pot ‘o Zen. If you’re looking for her lab, just follow the smell.

Herr Hep Cat (Herry) – Former laboratory subject, no one really knows how many lives Herry has already lived. He knows English, German, and Webster. Toilet trained and bored with most things human, Herry makes an excellent house guest. Just don’t try to beat him in a staring contest.

Dr. Adrian Holt – A Harvard grad and prof with so many PhDs we stopped counting. History, Philosophy, Anthropology … Etymology … This is the guy you call at 2 am to sound off about your existential crisis. Just don’t be surprised if some critter answers the phone, because he prefers the Fur Balls to most humans any day. He’s got a hell of a poker face and I’ve never seen him bluff. But, maybe I’m just too used to his chameleon charm. No offense, Dr. Holt, but you do blend in.

Homer – Our favorite rock dove knows morse code, clocks over 60 mph, and knows a ticket to ride when he sees one.  It is entirely possible Homer hung out with Tesla in a former life, but maybe he just knew a pigeon who did.

Ms. Ever Howell (AKA Shady Chica) – QUEST’s CEO is best known for her warm heart, cold hands, and a killer imagination. A true character assassination expert, Ever enjoys cooking, chess problems, furry animals, and RPGs. Blame it on the voices in her head. Someone give this woman a sticky note!

IOU-12 – Dynamo’s backup gal, IOU-12 operates out of Sanjay’s Marchive in New Dehli. Her coworkers include priceless artifacts, mountains of SHTF gear, and one demon plant. She learns fast and has a wide reach. Don’t let her binary fool you.

Miss Jamie – Call ahead and INDIE’s fresh-faced Hostess will have your drink order on the table before you walk in the door. Jamie specializes in superior hospitality, soulful song covers, and making sure the riff raff don’t make it past Pluto.

Joe – Ex-military man and Project Manager for MAXTECH, Joe’s your ideal backup man.

Dr. Ben Leavitt – Camp Hero’s Astrophysicist, older than dirt, and secret inventor of P.I.S.S. Rocket Fuel. Also, the likely inventor of Lone Star swagger itself. Hold onto your helmet when you head out with this Space Cowboy. Past times include party games like Texas Hold-em, Five-card Fold-em, and our personal no-nonse favorite, “I told ’em.” Ben’s a good egg, but he spends too much time in the sun.

Mr. Foster Luck (YOU FIGURE OUT THE ANAGRAM!) – For an ageless alien who can’t be killed, Foster doesn’t seem to have much luck–especially remembering which wave he rode in on. We’re not sure if his mind or mouth is his most formidable weapon. Just don’t ask him to make the coffee. Foster has an impressive protractor collection and probably knows what you’re thinking before you do. But don’t worry about any of that. He just wants to go home (wherever that is) and is super-cranky about it.

Chef Marlon – INDIE’s Head Chef, almost as famous for his hypnotic vocals as the soul food he fuels the Hub of the Universe with. His song-list, like the menu, changes daily, but never fails to impress. Wow your carnivore friends. Shock the vegans. No one goes home without a full tank and a smile.

Mr. Dennis Marshall – An anti-gov conspiracy theorist with his own radio show convinced the South will rise again. Dennis rants better than he plays poker and has a hard time tuning out. If he could calm down for five minutes, he might be charming.

Ms. Harriet Matthews (AKA Hattie) – Max’s mom … or should we say, MOM’s mom, which also makes her Warren Matthews’ daughter. Don’t let this charming fashion designer and doting mother fool you. She’s the only one who can beat her dad at chess, and she’s tougher than tungsten.

Dr. Max O. Matthews (AKA MOM) – Founder/Owner of MAXTECH, INC., Max has positioned himself to be Earth’s best mathemagician and most ineligible bachelor. If you like smotheringly nice, overprotective nerds who don’t trust anything they can’t equate, MOM’s your guy. Last we checked, his mom was still dressing him. But, damn, he looks like a million bucks. Just ask Dane.

Mr. Russ Matthews – A Massachusetts Congressman trying to fast track his way to the presidency by leveraging his family’s connections. But, unlike the rest of the Matthews, Russ is all smarm and no charm. Steer clear of this unscrupulous suit. He’s more unpredictable than he looks.

Mr. Warren Matthews (AKA Bunk) – Grandfather to Max and originally out of MI6, Warren spearheaded Camp Hero’s secret Warren Project. Multitasking as soldier, mathematician, and spy, Warren, became a hero among the few fortunate to know him. Do not play chess with this man. He can take down opponents in two moves.

Mr. Frye Peters, MA (AKA Wingman) – A software engineer fluent in every known code including spaghetti, ravioli, and all the other pastas, Frye is Ever’s favorite winger. His furiously fast fingers run any ware that’s soft. No one knows how this nervous nelly pulls it off, but he’s also the rightful owner of one of the Earth’s top video game empires, a damn good axe man, and can reduce hundreds of years of research to minutes with the right motherboard. One word of caution: your keyboards and mice are not safe around him–even the fancy titanium ones.

Dr. Dane Price – Kick ass Chemical Engineer by day, Heavy Metal god by night. Dane’s search of the fountain of youth will probably give him real frostbite one of these days. He takes his drinks straight, not neat, and does his most priceless work alone. Please, ladies and gents: when in Dane’s presence, keep flammables locked up at all times.

Ms. Rachel Roth – Quite possibly the worst of the super villains, or perhaps just the most complex miscreate, Roth’s unrelenting narcissism and complete disregard for any life less than immortal is utterly shameless. A voracious vixen. Vain viper. So many ominous words that start with V and too little time. Rachel’s the poster girl for hot mess. Pack up your sanity and walk away while you can if you encounter this one.

Mr. Dave (Tripp) Ryan – An MIT dropout turned world class mafia relocation expert who does his best to make fossil fuels a thing of the past. Our favorite Kinetics Engineer prefers a garage over a lab and has a passion for most things on wheels. He’s the first guy on the scene when you’re in a jam and worries constantly about where he’ll be when World War III breaks out. Always consult Tripp’s T-shirts before engaging in conversation. They usually come with instructions.

Dr. Quinn E. Stevens (AKA Dad, Tesla) – Founder and President of -QU-E-ST- INC., Quinn graduated MIT with doctorates in physics and mechanical engineering. On top of always being the smartest guy in the room, he’s got a gift for focusing–20/8 vision and photographic memory. Good luck lying to this guy.

Dr. Sanjay Prakash – Another MIT alum grad, with doctorates in Economics and Law, Sanjay quickly conquered the Black Market ladder and operates out of New Dehli. Known for his love of artifacts, dial up this guy for the rarest, weirdest, and most hair-raising stuff on the planet. Everything’s got a price tag. If you’re lucky, he’ll even let you pay him to sell you something.  (Yes, read that again).

Mr. Aaron Templeton – Camp Hero’s Project Manager and Special Ops Team Leader. Stay out of this guy’s path. He’s got a thing for arrows and tracks like a blood hound. In all seriousness, give props to this guy. He not only deserves it. He’ll use it.

Ms. Janis Templeton, MA (AKA Pinch) – A former military brat raised by her hero of a grandpa, Janis can handle herself in any pinch, and likes to remind anyone who crosses her of that fact with any number of several deadly syringes. It’s no small feat to run Bio-engineering at QUEST. We just hope her no nonsense approach never makes it to the poker table. She’s already killing it at darts.

Vica / Vicar – Though his birth name was Vica, thanks to the colorful accents of the inhabitants of the Hub of the Universe, along with his faith in god, Vica became “Vicar”. But, he doesn’t mind. Past times include prayer, beekeeping, and monk-ing. Don’t let the robe fool you, though. If you hand him a bazooka, he knows how to use it.

Ms. Savannah Wells – Who knew a sassy Biochemist could makes such a classy headbanger? Savannah’s got a soft spot for the Fur Balls and a knack for whistle blowing, putting Big Pharma and Uncle Sam on her tail, but her greatest accomplishment was stealing Dane’s heart.

Mr. Will Wexler, MA – Former porn ‘actor’ turned Mechanical Engineer, Will has also stars as Webster’s personal translator. QUEST engineer by day, hard core animal advocate by night, Will can build an at least three lethal weapons out of a headband and give the local strays a style upgrade at the same time. He’s a media darling, Earth’s best RPG soldier, and holds his own with a hockey stick.

Mr. Webster Willoughby, MA – Race track warrior and Earth’s record holder for fastest computer processor, this QUEST R&D-er is a real speed daemon. He’s even taken Homer under his wing for a shot at a racing title. When he’s not saving helpless pencils from Trey’s relentless drumming, Webby spends his time hugging trees. He’s especially fond of the cherry varieties.

Mr. X – A colleague of Tripp’s who can run closed-circuit surveillance on anyone from his underground lair. The only thing we really know about Mr. X is that he’s a family man–and not easily amused.